She slept for three days. Not moving, breathing shallowly. If she dreamed, there was no motion to her closed eyes. She didn't respond to sound or touch. Not Rean's quiet, pleading mantra telling her to wake up. Not Sarah's forced laughter or uncharacteristic sighs. Not Demi's rare tone of frustration.
        On the afternoon of the second day, Sarah ventured to the nearest down to send a message to Andrew. Even if he was unable to help... well, the thought hadn't really gone beyond that.
        "What happened?" Rean was asked, again and again. He didn't know, and he couldn't explain. Really, they knew that... they just couldn't help but ask.

------------------------

        On the night of the third day, they were sitting at the kitchen table in silence. That was what made the purely animal sound and crashing of furniture truly strike the depths of their souls; whoever was in that room was most certainly awake. But whether or not it was Rakashi...
        No one slept that night. Or ate. They took silent watches outside of her door and window, but she never did emerge. The wails of what could only be described as anger and agony continued on for hours, as did the destruction. Until there was nothing left to destroy, they assumed.
        Still she did not emerge. Rean had the stomach-churning honor of hearing the moment she stopped raging at random objects and broke down and sobbed in a purely human sound of absolute suffering. He sat against the door and fought similar tears. Something awful had come from the knowledge she sought.
        Or worse, maybe. That knowledge could simply be that something awful.

------------------------

        On the morning of the fourth day, the worry was sinking in bone-deep. Rean was still numb and untalkative as he sat up against the door, but then none of them were up for much of a conversation. The sobs inside the room behind him had died down just after dawn, but he still felt them sticking to his skin. He wanted to open the door, wanted so badly to open the door...
        It wasn't until evening started to fall that Demi walked by, shook his head and sat beside his friend. There no longer seemed to be anything carefree or jovial about the man--his face was tired. Older than it ought to have been.
        "I want to go in." Rean spoke up quietly.
        "That's a stupid idea, kid."
        "I don't care."
        Demi sighed into his hand as he tried to come up with... anything. Words. Ideas. Something that might pass for wisdom. "Something happened out there. We can't exactly be sure that she's still... y'know."
        "I know." The brunet countered, voice quiet but sure. "I have to find out. I can't not know."
        The former captain's stony conviction wasn't really something that his friend was used to; at least, not in serious situations. "You could wind up hating her." He suggested, not sure why he hadn't said, She could wind up killing you. He was pretty sure he ought to be taking hold of the kid's collar and shaking him, demanding to know why he was acting like such a suicidal idiot. He supposed he sort of knew the answer to that, anyway.
        "I could." Rean agreed calmly. "I have to know, one way or another. I can't just sit out here and... wait."
        "You don't have the training to defend yourself." Demi tried another tactic.
        "She knows that." The brunet insisted, avoiding eye contact.
        "She used to know that." His friend countered. "What's in there--"
        "Is still Rakashi." It took Rean a little too much effort to keep his voice down.
        "How the hell can you know that?" There was no venom in Demi's tone, but there was certainly steel in it.
        "She's still here, isn't she?"
        It wasn't as though there'd been agreement. Nothing close. But the raven-haired man just sighed, putting his hand on his friend's shoulder. No words seemed appropriate, so he didn't offer any. Just a quick glance before he stood up and walked back downstairs.
        That was enough. Rean took a few seconds to gather himself to stand, legs aching, back popping. He couldn't let himself think before reached for the doorknob, turning it slowly, quietly, and stepping inside. While he closed the door behind himself, he didn't lock it. No need, he supposed... even though he could see the destruction in the morning light streaming through the eerily curtain-less window. Scattered from wall to wall, across every inch of space, furniture torn to splinters, fabric reduced to threads, lamps and little comforts shattered. Parts of the walls had been torn open. The window glass had cracked, but not broken. The thick scent of settling dust and dried, broken wood was just mild enough to fall short of irritating his sinuses. Sitting in the middle of it all and turned away...
        He swallowed and took a slow, deep breath. "Rakashi?"
        Nothing. Not even the sound of breathing. No flinching, not so much as an unconscious acknowledgment that he'd been heard. He waited. He was already prepared to wait four more days, if he had to.
        "...Rean..?" she spoke after several minutes, her voice thick, raspy, sounding vaguely of sleep and undefinable emotion. "That's... your name, isn't it? Rean?"
        His teeth clenched, body aching all the more. "Yes..."
        She nodded shakily, still facing away from him. "There are others..? Two others?"
        He thought that maybe he finally knew what poets talked about when they spoke of an ache that nothing could lessen. "Yeah. Demi and Sarah."
        Another long, drifting silence. "It's... hard to remember where... things begin and end. Time... got damaged..."
        Rean didn't even understand why tears stung in his eyes. Her voice made her sound so lost, the words not helping...and there was such a terrifyingly empty feeling to it all. He tried not to let his voice shake, staying as strong as he could possibly manage. "I... could I come closer, Rakashi?"
        "No." She whispered instantly, sounding weak and hurt and so very much not herself. "I might... I don't know if I can... I might try to hurt... or kill... everything..."
        "I'm not afraid." He responded, wiping his eyes almost shamefully. "I'm not afraid of you. If you wind up killing me, then... at least it was you, right?" He couldn't quite manage to keep his voice steady with those words, but he continued regardless. "I'd be... okay with that."
        She curled in on herself, shaking pitifully. "No." She repeated a few times, seemingly unaware of Rean's slow steps toward her. "Nothing else... should be damaged. Not anymore..."
        He didn't care. It was too much not to be at her side, to attempt some comfort. Fuck the consequences; he knelt and embraced her, disturbed more by the fact that she didn't fight him in the least.
        "It's all gone." She whispered, too tired to cry and too worn down to do anything more than whisper.
        Really, he had absolutely no idea what she was referring to, but... he could relate in some way. Something stronger than words, than conversation or even instinct, had been passed from her... and it just ached. Everything ached. He wished there were enough platitudes in all the world to heal it... not that he had the power to speak any of them in the moment.

------------------------

        Demi cautiously, silently opened the door an hour or so later, not so much concerned by the silence as he was by the sheer amount of time there had been no movement. He saw two forms curled up together amidst the staggering debris--both still breathing, by the look of it. It wasn't... as comforting of a picture as he was hoping to find, leaving him standing there with absolutely no idea of what to do next.
        "Demi." Came Rean's whisper, cautious and trying not to wake Rakashi. Though, with all that had gone on, he doubted that he should be worried. She was just too tired in too many ways to bother.
        The raven-haired man really wasn't sure if he ought to enter that room. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, but everything just felt... different. As if something had changed dramatically, grown... dimmer. He shook his head and tried to banish such a ridiculous notion. Carefully, he moved around the wreckage as silently as he could to kneel beside his friend. If he really was forced to acknowledge the situation, he'd have to admit that being around Rakashi in that moment, even sleeping, made him incredibly nervous. Even so, just being there seemed to be the important part. His voice was quiet, keeping a calm that he didn't entirely feel. "What's going on, kid?"
        He shook his head lightly, not even remotely certain of how to respond. "Blankets... could you bring some blankets?"
        Demi gave him a speculative look. "You sure it's best for you to stay here?"
        "Yeah." Rean's voice was just as rough as Rakashi's had been. "I just... have to be here."
        Once again he found himself sighing. "And you call me an idiot."

------------------------

        She woke in a curl of blankets in the dark of night, body jerking away from the warm thing that had moved behind her. Her body felt drained of all life, completely unable to defend herself from whatever it was--
        "S'okay, Rakashi." Rean was careful to keep his voice soft and calm even though he was still only half-conscious. He didn't move to pull her back, but reached to place a hand on her shoulder to let her know he was really there. There just... didn't seem to be any more that he could do.
        She shivered, trying to figure out if she were awake or dreaming. Or if it even mattered. Her dreams had been memories... but they were mixed between worlds and warped, cut apart, scattered like puzzle pieces. Things... weren't right. She very much doubted that they would ever be right again, or make sense. All things, all places, all experiences, had been thrown asunder. Even so, as she let her eyes scan the room, she remembered. "Guess I really tore this place up, huh..."
        He couldn't help but be glad to hear Rakashi again... even if she sounded strained, hurt. She sounded like herself, though. Of course, she also made it sound like she could see in near-total darkness... "Can you see it?"
        Swallowing, she pulled her knees in closer. "I've always been able to, a little... but more, now."
        There was a long silence as Rean sat up and scooted to sit closer. The air was heavy with questions left unasked--though they all boiled down to one. "He just... left." He spoke of an entirely different line of thought, one that even managed to surprise him. "Just handed you over to me and... left."
        "That's good." She responded, distantly. "He kept his word."
        Silence again as he fought the urge to speak platitudes or wrap his arms around her as if that would make everything better. What an idiot he was. A fact made especially clear when he finally gave voice to all of those questions, asking simply, 'What happened?"
        Rakashi responded without anger or annoyance--without emotion. "He made me remember... who I was... where I came from..."
        His throat was dry with possibilities. "So, I guess... you'll be trying to get back there, huh?"
        She took a couple of seconds to compose herself enough to answer. "It's gone." Her tone fell into a numbness, as if discussing something purely dull and ridiculously hard to understand. "Family, friends, the world they existed in... are gone. This body isn't mine. The strange man's name is Arabis. He's under the impression that he came here 'naturally'. No one winds up here 'naturally'."
        His head was spinning a bit from all of the not-quite-information. There was too much to ask, to actually be able to pick another single question--
        She interrupted with an off-hand thought, spoken. "Two lifetimes, in a sense..." Her laugh was too fake, too empty. "Yeah. Great. I'm a fucking cat. Third time's a charm, or so I hear."
        He really wanted to prove that, suddenly. "Let's... start off with some more sleep, first. Okay?"
        Rakashi's eyes glowed a soft gold in the dark as they focused right on him... but her stare wasn't disapproving. Morning, then. She could attempt to start this "new life" in the morning. He didn't ask and she didn't invite him; staying beside her was implied.

------------------------

        All was completely motionless silence. It was approaching late morning, and both Demi and Sarah had given up on the idea that they'd be getting any clue as to what was going on that day. They certainly didn't expect the formerly absent sleep-disheveled pair to emerge from the closed room and head directly for the kitchen table.
        It was surreal. Too mundane in the absolutely insane they'd been living in for days.
        It took a few tries. A few breaths to really get it started. A little strange at first, considering the subject matter... but nothing could stop Demi's laughter once it started, even if it did take a little more effort than usual.
        The late arrivals stared at one another from across the table for a moment before Rean finally decided familiarity was a decent thing. "Shut up, Demi."
        Of course, that only managed to make the man laugh harder and far more naturally. He was glad for it, though. It was a... hopeful thing.
        Sarah finally caught her breath from the unexpected entrance and cleared her throat, approaching Rakashi slowly. She didn't want to give a single reason for fear or distrust, certain that her friend had enough on her mind. "Does this mean you'd like breakfast, then?"
        In all brutal honesty, she wasn't sure that she could ever be hungry again. Her stomach was protesting the very idea of food, but her body... she couldn't let herself be physically weak. Not when she had no idea what was to happen next. Rakashi spoke slowly, quietly, as if unused to her own voice. "Yeah. Sure. I guess that would be a... good thing."
        The other woman took her leave, perfectly satisfied to distract herself by making food enough for all of them. No one had eaten well for quite some time.
        As usual, it was Demi to make the first violent stab at real conversation--despite the blank stare from Rean. "How are you feeling, Rakashi?"
        She looked genuinely surprised to be asked, though the answer came long before she had a chance to think it over. "Every instinct in me is telling me to kill everything."
        There was a pause after that confession when even the former captain had absolutely no response. It proved to be a small obstacle at best. "That's just pre-coffee speak."
        She made the attempt to smile, even if it did turn out weak. They didn't fear her... at least not to the extent of hate. Not yet. They had no will to hurt her. Not like... shredded, half-dreamed memories... She shook her head, trying to physically banish the thoughts.
        "Is the war over, General?" Sarah asked over a bowl of beaten eggs.
        A nonsensical question, perhaps... but one she found herself answering. "I'm not sure something like that ever ends. It seems a... constant fact of existence."
        Too deep. Way too deep. Demi stood to get her some coffee himself.
        "So there's no peace even where you're from..." Sarah's voice was a whisper, a bit disappointed with that idea.
        "There is no utopia." Rakashi responded almost matter-of-factly. "The mistake seems to be in thinking there is a greater good."
        Well if no one else was going to ask, then Rean supposed he may as well. "So... what happened?"
        "A world destroyed." She answered distantly, nodding her thanks to Demi for setting a mug of extremely strong coffee in front of her. "Nothing out of the ordinary, honestly. Except that it was mine and all."
        The former captain took note of the humor that was trying very hard to settle back inside of Rakashi as she spoke, trying to get used to being there again. He'd had an idea that if she ever remembered where she came from, and specifically how she came to be dragged away from there, it would be hard to adjust to put things lightly. He wanted to know more, they all did... but he wanted to keep her somewhat stable, as well. It felt best to keep her talking. "Destroyed by what?"
        The first sip of coffee was... nice. Grounding. Even if it was apparent that Rean had nothing to do with it, not that she minded the extra strong bitterness considering the subject matter. "Revolution. An error in programming. Some cock-sure deity with too much time on Its cosmic hands. Depends on the point of view, I guess."
        That was... interesting as all hell. "How..." Rean tried to articulate the most obvious question in his mind. "What got you 'out' in the first place?"
        Rakashi shook her head slowly, closing her eyes to drown out the memories or to enhance them; even she wasn't quite sure. Everything was still so... nightmarish, not real and yet far too real. Images, sounds, shards of things... not to mention the difficulty of trying to think in two distinctly different groups of archetypes at the same time. "It started with genocide... and what we knew of the universe around us lead us to believe that we could escape. The... the Strain, that string that binds everything together that Andrew referred to..." She was trying so hard to make sense of it, let alone to express, explain. Eventually she merely sighed, giving up. "I can't remember much about the... end. And it's not particularly coherent, anyway."
        Sarah carefully placed a full plate in front of the former general, studying her reaction. She hadn't really expected that much hunger, even after days of not eating, though she was pleased to see that the fork was at least tentatively picked up. That much assured, she went back for the other plates and orange juice.
        Daintily picking at the scrambled eggs and toast, Rakashi wondered if the bacon was worth the risk. Well, perhaps later, if her stomach proved stable enough.
        "I remember..." Demi spoke up quietly, out of nowhere. "Seeing you for the first time, I mean. I wasn't supposed to be there, but I had to deliver a report..."
        Even as he trailed off, she pressed for more. "I don't remember."
        No, he supposed she wouldn't have. Somehow it seemed easier to continue when he was staring down at his plate. "I just remember... catching movement through one of those little windows in the infirmary doors, you know? Had to go over and see what it was... and I guess were kind of tearing the hell out of some of the staff." Demi wasn't entirely willing to admit to how much blood there'd been. Or how the one guy was screaming, Rakashi half-crouched on the floor with her lips pulled back in a feral expression... "I was sort of pulled away before I saw much more. 'Reprimanded' with a broken arm and told not to talk about it again. A week later, I was on the project." Even he'd understood that he'd seen too much to just "forget about it"--but he was too well-known and liked to have just disappeared.
        There was a span of silence as she considered that information. "Who broke your arm?"
        The former captain looked up, a little surprised by the question--but only a little. "The illustrious Admiral Quent, actually."
        Her only response for several seconds was the way she stabbed at bits of egg with sharper motions. "I sort of wish I'd been the one to kill the bastard." She stated perfectly simply.
        "We were all waiting for the day, General." Demi joked easily.
        With an amused snort, she corrected softly, "Not a general anymore." Not that they needed to be told, she supposed. Given another few seconds of thought, she admitted, "Maybe I do remember, a little. The room, the staff... thought it was just another nightmare."
        Sarah's fork went down immediately. All of those times went she'd been so eager to convince Rakashi that her dreams of blood, killing and being restrained were just nightmares, understandable for her field and position... She'd just never imagined...
        Rean took it all in with a considering silence. To think of how much had changed on a fundamental level, or maybe how much simply wasn't real to begin with... --No, that wasn't it. She was still Rakashi; he knew that without a doubt.
        "Well." Demi interrupted the long, strangling silence around the table. "She show you any fun moves last night, kid?" He narrowly avoided several pieces of toast aimed at his head, but couldn't manage to avoid the kick in the shin and the rough, spontaneous laughter that was from the former general herself.

------------------------

        Rakashi spent most of the morning and afternoon outside with Sarah, learning the routine of tending to the animals and crops. It was almost as if she were settling in to stay... and the blond nearly let herself believe that, no matter how fleetingly.
        Rean spent his time nervous. Inside, cleaning up the room that had been more or less destroyed... and being very nervous. No one had asked what was going to happen next, what Rakashi was thinking or what her intentions were now. He thought he would have been a lot more glad for that.
        Demi had somewhat surprisingly taken to the general house chores--a shock only because he'd always seemed like he hadn't done a single chore, by choice or otherwise, in his entire life. He was quite apt at it, though, taking care of the kitchen while humming a variety of unrecognizable and off-key tunes. At one point he got so loud that he almost didn't hear the door.
        That in itself was a strange thing. No one was ever known to visit, the people in the area keeping to themselves. Not to mention that they were in the middle of nowhere... Seeing as how they were all sort of escapees to a point, Demi kept humming as he made his way to the front door, stopping at the closet to take a pistol from a jacket pocket. Upon opening the front door, however, he was quite pleased that he wouldn't be needing it. "Took ya long enough."
        Andrew stood on the front porch, looking every bit as though he'd been on several trains for exactly as long as he had been. He gave his colleague a blank look, commenting flatly, "I'd ask you if that was a gun in your hand, but..."
        "Oh, just come in." The other man invited, stepping aside. "Guess we have a full house now--hey! You don't have any luggage?"
        "No possessions." Andrew shrugged. "Now what's this about Rakashi being in trouble?"
        "Well... er..." Demi began uncertainly. "She's fine, now. But... apparently she's not the only... 'one of her kind' here."
        A shiver went through the other man. "They didn't create another one..?"
        "No, no. I'm not quite sure what happened..." Explaining the situation, he realized, would entail actually understanding it. He supposed he could do his best. "Point is, she remembers. From before. Her... life, before. They don't really seem like the best kinds of memories to have."
        Too much to absorb in such a short period of time. "And the boy? Rean?"
        The former captain gave a familiar cocky grin. "Oh, he's just dandy. Actually, he's cleaning up the... result of remembering."
        Rean had actually been able to hear everything, having stopped what he was doing just to listen. The words make him flinch a bit, but that was a... decent way to describe things.
        The back door swung open then, signaled by the telltale squeak of its hinges. Demi gave a quick nod in the direction of the kitchen. "Everyone's here now. Meet and greet?"
        Andrew didn't appear to be all that excited about the idea, uncertain of his welcome. Seeing as how there seemed to be an "incident" that needed cleaning up, combined with the way things had been left at the inn... "Maybe I should... just..."
        "Oh!" Sarah had merely been looking for Demi, not expecting the company. "You made it here fast. Want something to eat?"
        Curious about who she was talking to, Rakashi wandered into the room, leaning against the doorway once she'd recognized their guest. "Well." She made her presence known. "Gang's all here."

------------------------

        The former general had left Sarah and Demi to dote over Andrew, chatting him up and feeding him well after his trip. She elected to busy herself by offering Rean a hand with cleaning up the room. It was kind of her fault for mostly destroying it, anyway.
        "You don't have to." He insisted.
        "I feel I should." She didn't quite argue, picking up the broom in the corner.
        He could accept that. Besides, it gave him the opportunity to talk to her alone. "So... what are you going to do now?"
        She considered the question for a moment, mentally adding up the cost of everything that had been damaged beyond repair... which was pretty much everything but the walls. "Possibly make sure that everyone with knowledge of who I am and where I'm from is either on our side or dead." She didn't sugar-coat the truth.
        Rean had no idea of whether he was grateful or not. That task seemed so... unfortunate. Heavy.
        "You'll stay here, with the others." She informed him, voice quiet but stern.
        He felt very cold all of a sudden. "You're going alone?"
        "It wouldn't be safe." She simplified without looking up. Sweeping up the bits of glass and ceramic were... easier.
        Yeah, he saw her point. And he sure as hell wasn't eager to behave in a suicidal way, but he honestly believed his words. "I don't think any of us would want you to do this alone."
        Sighing, she stopped and rested her folded arms at the top of the broom's handle. "I'm a bit of a pack animal." She admitted softly. "Used to a group. But this just wouldn't work." Before Rean had a chance to argue, she reminded him, "And my shoulder proves it."
        His lungs felt momentarily too constricted to allow a gasp. "Is... is it okay?" That was the safer question.
        And the easier one to answer. "Yeah. It's... healed now, actually." She saw it coming, eyes sharp and softly glowing... and still she waited, watching him.
        He didn't really want to ask. But it was something that he felt he needed to know. "So... when I shot you... how did that happen?"
        Rakashi took a very slow breath, going over the events. "Arabis... had come more to taunt than anything. I probably woke you up with yelling." Despite the subject matter, she gave a genuine sound of amusement. "You came out of the tent with your gun drawn and just... stopped." Her voice fell in tone and volume, the events just a little difficult to talk about. "He thought he'd show me that I was 'still a monster'... but it looked more like he was using you as a puppet. The first shots were only warnings, only his fun... it wasn't until I'd turned to shoot him that I was actually hit." Her eyes grew distant, but her voice was calm. "He thought he'd 'do me a favor' by sending you back to bed. I told him I'd send him back to hell. Shots were fired, you know the rest."
        It was remarkably hard to swallow, let alone think. If that not-man could use him as a puppet, then... he might be capable of a lot more...
        "You'll stay." She assured. "You'll all stay and take care of each other."
        "And you'll go off and die somewhere, so long as you take him with you?" Rean asked quietly. The question was sort of out of nowhere, but he had this feeling...
        The former general blinked as if stricken. "Well... I don't particularly belong here, do I?"
        "Of course you--" he managed to stop before making a complete fool of himself... maybe. "You're welcome here. We want you here. And you're not a monster."
        It was all... so very odd as she considered his words in silence. "You are an idiot." She announced--though there was the slightest little smile at the corners of her mouth.
        "Demi's the idiot." Rean corrected. "I'm just... the apprentice, apparently."
        Now that made her laugh, tension easing. "Fine, we'll discuss it. Later." Damn humans.

------------------------

        After they'd done all that they could manage, Rakashi excused herself to wander outside alone. Just walking around the grounds by herself was an appealing idea after having everyone of importance in her life in the same house.
        Well... almost everyone. What continued to make Rean nervous was that strange man, Arabis... and the fact that he didn't know if Rakashi knew his name because he'd told her, or had actually known him from before. He was insane, clearly, obviously--but that didn't mean he was lying, exactly.
        Shaking his head at himself, he supposed that he would just have to accept there was more to discuss in the future. The near future, probably; but for the moment, trying to find something like "normalcy" would be kind of nice. Even if he was tempted to go right back up the stairs he'd just come down because of the already well-established conversation in the kitchen.
        It was surprisingly Sarah who noticed him and invited, "No need to be shy, Rean. Sit down, there's still more pie."
        "Hot, even." Demi added, taking the remaining third of the apple pie out of the oven.
        Well... that was too hard to resist. He sat in the same chair he'd been using carefully, still feeling just a little out of place oven with his friend's familiar, good-natured chuckle.
        "So." Andrew spoke up, albeit with a slightly timid air.
        "Told you he was a survivor." Demi sounded like he was boasting, bringing over the freshly cut and still-steaming dessert to the table.
        Andrew seemed a touch on the more reserved side of things (for which Rean was extremely grateful), pretending to cough rather than laugh. "At this point, I suppose we all are."
        "And there's absolutely no better way to celebrate than with pie." Sarah chimed in.
        Demi took it upon himself to complain, "Now if only we had ice cream."
        Leaning forward, Andrew proved that he was more reserved, yes; but the sense of humor was about the same. "Rean, I'll give you $20 if you stab the captain with a fork."
        The brunet laughed, whatever out of place feeling he'd had before fading. Yeah, this... wasn't so bad. Rakashi could take care of herself, would be back soon. And the rest of them could just... get used to this for a bit.
        It was when that fork was reached for that Demi finally pulled back a little. "New rule at the table: no stabbing."